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If you and your baby are still struggling to make nursing
work, if you stopped nursing before you wanted, or if you never
really got started, first of all give yourself a big, warm hug
for your efforts. With even a little breastmilk, or even
a little nursing, you have given your baby an irreplaceable start
on life. You can build on that wonderful start no matter
how you feed your baby, if you remember that your baby's needs
and expectations are still the same...
All babies expect to be held. By
using a sling instead of a stroller, you can provide the closeness
and movement that babies expect, even if that closeness doesn't
include breastfeeding. Some "bucket babies" in their plastic
seats may settle for a pacifier when what they really need is to
be held. Remember that stimulation builds brains, and carrying
provides a world of stimulation and security that a pacifier or
swing cannot.
Babies expect Mama. A
breastfed baby gets all his calories from a close-contact relationship
with his mother. Some bottle-fed babies get many of their
calories with no body contact at all. Remember that milk and mothers
have always gone together, and enjoy this important time in both
your lives. It's normal and healthy for babies to be dependent
on their mothers. Let your baby depend on you now, and she'll have
the security to be confidently independent later.
Babies expect to sleep with adults. Babies
have a healthier, more normal sleep pattern when they don't sleep
alone. If you keep a cooler at your bedside, you can answer
your baby's nighttime needs before either of you really wakens, and
you'll all get more sleep. During the day, let her nap in your
arms; don't be in a rush to put her down. If you wear your
baby in a sling, she can nap with you as you go about your day, and
she will enjoy the body contact that's normal for our species. | Babies don't expect to
wait. Nursing babies wait only moments for
a snack, and often nurse before they're really hungry. Be
prepared for those quick snuggle-and-snack times by keeping
milk ready. Check with your doctor if you're worried
about overfeeding.
Babies expect only breastmilk
for about the first half year. Check with
your doctor before adding anything but breastmilk or formula
to your baby's immature digestive system.
Babies expect to be healthy. A
baby's immune system is not well developed, and formula will
not protect against illness. Even a little expressed
breastmilk each day helps normalize your baby's health and
development, for as long as you can provide it. Follow
your doctor's guidelines on cleanliness and feeding to further
reduce illnesses. It's no fun to be sick!
Babies expect to feel
a lot of skin. Just because she isn't nursing
doesn't mean she can't enjoy your body. Take naps
and baths together, and enjoy touching. If your breast
continues to be a cozy, happy place for your baby to snuggle,
you never know what might happen! Some non-nursing
babies have begun nursing at two, five, even 12 or more
months of age. And whatever happens, you and your
baby deserve the important pleasure of staying in touch.
©2001 Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC
136 Ellis
Hollow Creek Road Ithaca, NY 14850
Used with permission
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