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You're important, not only to yourself but to others. You
have important things to do. Many of those things are scheduled. You're
picking your mother up at the airport Tuesday at 3:00. You
have a hair appointment Thursday at 10:00. Your workday
has a definite beginning and end. So does your partner's. That
means it works best to have the day's major events scheduled.
Now imagine that, on top of all that,
you also need to schedule your bathroom breaks. You need
to train yourself to use the bathroom every 2 1/2 hours. No
running to the bathroom between times, no skipping a bathroom
break because you don't feel the need. Every 2 1/2 hours. On
the dot.
What? No time among the important
events in your day for that kind of rigid scheduling of a trivial
event? Of course not. Our day runs most smoothly
when it's organized around the major events, with minor events
fitting in on a fluid basis, not when it's organized around the
minor events.
Our culture has come to think of feeding
a baby as a major event, and there are plenty of books that tell
us we need to schedule this major event in order to have our
lives run smoothly, in order for the baby not to take over our
lives, in order to make time for everything else. Ah, but
what if feeding a baby is a minor event? If it is,
aren't we allowing it too much control over our lives if we elevate
it to "must-be-scheduled" status? | At
first, nursing a baby is time-consuming and all-consuming. You
feel as if your whole day revolves around feeding the baby, and
it sounds good to think that you could schedule this major event
and somehow get some control over it. Scheduling sounds
like a sanity-saver.
But once you learn how to position
a baby easily for nursing, once the baby learns how to latch
on quickly, once the early weeks are past, feeding just
isn't a major event. You can nurse while you cook,
in bed, while you watch tv, or eat, or write, or walk. If
your baby is given the chance to snack as he sees the need,
he's never really hungry, and you can "top him off" because you want
to do something rather than because he's asked, stretching
the next nursing interval as a result. Or you can stall
him for a bit while you finish an activity. Or you can
take a quick break from that activity, nurse for just a couple
minutes, and leave him full enough to wait a bit longer.
This kind of free-wheeling approach
of frequent, short, flexible nursings leaves your day free
to structure itself around other more interesting activities. When
feeding the baby is an incidental activity, like snuggling
him, everyone's day usually runs more smoothly, including the
baby's... and yours.
©2001 Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC
136 Ellis
Hollow Creek Road Ithaca, NY 14850
Used with permission
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